Here I am

In London...at 12:51 am...in the lobby of Hotel Lily

I am just blocks away from where the bus depot is.

I had to pay 40 pounds for tis room, which I am annoyed about. I went over to the bus depot and considered jumping over the fence with my stuff and sleeping on the concrete in the carpark. But, I opted to come to a hotel and have one shower and night of sleep (well, nap) before embarking on my Glastonbury journey. I will be camping on Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday nights, I will come back to London on Monday and then fly to Oslo that night.

Let's just focus on this first festival and not get ahead of ourselves (well, myself because we are really just talking about me)...which I will know begin a rant about after this cigarette.

I do these things alone. Last summer, I did this for two months. This summer, I do it for 3 weeks. This is what I do.

In asking myself, why I love this stuff so much and having had other people (namely, my brother and my dad too), there is some confusion.

WHY is it that i love this shit?

Music has been my escape and my obsession for so long. Regardless of all that is happening in my life, music is my constant. When I was in Boulder, I could always go to the Fox. I went to shows solo all the time. It made no difference to me. I always was up on some new bands. To me, I am lonely and have been for awhile. Whether it was in high school, when I had a ton of friends (read: acquaintances) but no one who I was very close with. I lacked that close circle, that srong bond, of close friends. That followed me to college where I knew many people but was close with few. Then, I took a job working for Sasha after college for University Denim where I was on the road 3 weeks out of every month for 10 months. It was and is hard to be close with people. And, now I am back living in LA, and while I know a lot of people, I am close with few (to none). So, music is there for me. Watching my videos on Panjea and blasting the music in my car or stereo. It is always there. That consistency.

Tonight, I was really going to hop that fence and sleep on the ground in that bus depot but I, and this randomly popped into my head at the time, what my dad said when he gave me 300 USD: sleep in a hotel and have nice bed and shower a few times please. HAHA. Well, dad, I am heeding your advice. And, while I think that that 40 quid could have been better spent on a pair of wellies or a bag of blow, here I am.

[this pack of hispanic tourists talking about how they went thru this ghetto and black guys all over]...funny people

In any event, another sip of whiskey...1:20am...a cigarette and some shut eye...hopefully, not alone, a prospect has sat nearby...go for it....

ds37